Daily Telegraph (Australia)
Leaving camp denial
By Kathy McCabe
July 20, 2006 12:00

Hayes wed his male partner in London. / The Daily Telegraph

WHEN two people are married, it is natural for them to share their joy with family, friends and associates.

Anyone who saw Darren Hayes perform at his Sydney Opera House concerts earlier this month was in no doubt as to the extent of his newfound happiness.

He told his fans that he was in love and then dedicated his latest single, So Beautiful, to his partner.

That gold band on his finger certainly hinted the partnership was in fact a marriage.

This week Hayes chose to tell the world that he was indeed married to his partner of two years, Richard Cullen, in a civil partnership ceremony in London on June 19.

In a personal message to his fans on his website, Hayes eloquently and with much emotion celebrated his union, saluted his family for their "unconditional love" and thanked his loyal fans for their continued support.

The fact that Hayes is gay has been no secret in music industry circles or to a vast proportion of his fans.

Countless journalists in both mainstream media and gay press have pestered - and I mean pestered - Hayes on the question of his sexuality year after year.

He made an art of dodging and weaving the question, even giving inventive clues such as: "When was the last time you saw me on the red carpet with a fake girlfriend?"

When he told me almost a year ago that he was madly in love and had found his soul mate, I congratulated him, wished him the best and moved on to the next question about the Savage Garden best of compilation that was about to be released.

Why didn't I press it?

I do not think it is relevant to his music and I believe it is a private matter. After all, I do not walk into a room and introduce myself: "Hi, I'm Kathy, I'm a writer and I'm straight."

I do not think Hayes' artistic contribution should be examined through the prism of his sexuality.

And I know for a fact, thanks to plenty of historical evidence, that 'coming out' can damage your career.

A proportion of the fans who swooned over his poster on their bedroom wall, who sang their lungs out to Savage Garden songs, who thought he was singing just to them, will now drop him faster than can you say "I just saw George Michael in a public toilet block".

Why? Because they are homophobic, narrow-minded twits who remain determinedly bigoted despite the fact it is 2006 and we all should just be able to live and let live by now.

Even though a large percentage of Hayes' female fan base would have had their suspicions that the over-the-top campness of his Opera House shows loudly signalled his sexual orientation, they remained comfortable in their delusion.

As long as Hayes didn't say it out loud, they could still lust after him in denial.

I overheard some of them bitching at the opening night that Hayes was being too "flamboyant", that he wasn't singing the Savage Garden songs exactly how they are on the record.

They definitely didn't care for the electro-club sound of the songs from his second solo album The Tension And The Spark, an album littered with clues to a long search for his sexual identity.

And the music business isn't much better at dealing with the marketing and selling of gay artists.

A blonde airhead with a hit is much easier to promote than an opinionated, intelligent homosexual with a hit.

There is a great deal of pressure on high-profile gay entertainers to reveal their sexuality, to become a role model for their community.

And certainly everyone from Sir Elton John - who took forever to come out - to Ian Roberts, from k.d. lang to Ellen DeGeneres have stepped up to the plate in this regard.

But why is it that gay icons are more commercially successful than gay artists who do the big reveal?

Kylie and Madonna remain phenomenally successful and retain their 'straight' audience despite being gay icons.

Yet George Michael and Melissa Etheridge have had to suffer ever-diminishing returns for their album sales.

Maybe it's simply a case that we like their old stuff better than their new stuff, as Hayes sang to open his Big Night In show at the Opera House.

Many entertainers choose to keep silent about their sexuality because they don't want the responsibility of being a poster boy for a cause.

That is their decision to make and it should be respected.

Hayes has simply chosen to tell the world what they already knew and should be celebrated for his bravery and congratulated for his happiness.

Now let's hope the same people offer him the support he has given them in contributing to the soundtrack of their lives.

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